Monday, September 19, 2005

Americans embrace new military draft

Polls indicate that Americans overwhelmingly favor the new draft plan unveiled this morning by the White House.

The plan, announced in a news conference jointly hosted by President Bush and Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld will add nearly 750,000 troops to the US Army in the next 90 days. Polls show that Americans support the plan, with over 80% approval. A vast majority of whites approve the plan, with an equal percentage of Blacks registering disapproval.

"Its a 'win, win' solution," crowed Secretary Rumsfeld, "We replenish our badly depleted military while at the same time taking care of the problem of what to do with those displaced by Hurricane Katrina. What's not to like?"

Rumsfeld acknowledged that some Katrina survivors may not want to serve. "Hey," he said, "You can't always have the draftees you want. You make do with what you have." He said that those who fail to show up at induction centers will be tracked down and shipped to the basic training centers even now being constructed across the Gulf region under an emergency no-bid contract awarded late last night to Halliburton Industries.

The White House pointed out that in addition to providing the evacuees much needed food, shelter and jobs, combing the Katrina relief efforts with "Operation Enduring Freedom" would provide a new source of funds to the Iraqi effort. The President pledged unlimited funds to the displaced people and if we can move those people to Iraq, than we will get double duty out of those tax dollars according to White House sources.


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