Saturday, February 25, 2006

Can People Be This Stupid? People Can.


Microwaved Penis Turns Out To Be Fake

By JOE MANDAK, Associated Press Writer

Friday, February 24, 2006



Now I have to admit that the above headline got my attention. The story in a nutshell is that a couple go into a convenience store and ask to warm something up in the microwave there. The clerk notices that the item that they place in the microwave is apparently a severed penis and calls the cops.

Now here is where an admittedly already strange story starts to get seriously weird. It turns out that the woman is due to take a pre-employment drug piss test and she is trying to find a way to beat it. These morons get hold of one of those fake dicks with a pee reservoir , you know, the thing designed for GUYS to hang out of their pants in front of the drug inspector, which they fill with the boyfriend's clean pee.

She and her boyfriend were warming up the device in the microwave so that the pee it dispensed would be body temperature as it streamed out in front of the inspector. That's all fine and good, but didn't she ever stop to think that the drug inspector just might get kinda suspicious when this woman pulls out her dick to pee in the jar? Hello?

I don't know what kind of job she was applying for, but my guess is that unless it was one where the cash register has pictures of food items on the buttons instead of numbers, she probably isn't qualified. I just hope that the mastermind of this plot was the drug addled woman and not her substance free boyfriend.

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